From the equality of rights springs identity of our highest interests; you cannot subvert your neighbor's rights without striking a dangerous blow at your own. Carl Schurz

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Oh My GAWD, There's Spots On The Flatware

I've been seeing reports all week about this new blight that has been plaguing Canadians across the land.Mysterious spots have begun to appear on our flat and glass ware, What  are we to do?

While Canadians recoil in disgust from this nasty invader our government has remained silent, preferring instead to pretend to focus on minor distractions such as revolutions and the economy while also pretending not to be focused on retaining power at all costs.

Well they can't run and hide from this plague any longer. Their secret is out! Our government has entered in to yet another free trade agreement, this one with the dastardly Communist Aquatic Revolutionary Proletariat (CARP).

As is usual with these agreements our government has given away another measure of our sovereignty by agreeing to ban the use of phosphates in our dishwasher detergent. Rise up people march on Ottawa and demand  the repeal of this unholy alliance with the CARP and end this plague of spots.

The dish on dishwasher soap

Detergent change makes for dingy dishes


  1. A "dishwasher"? What is is this strange and newfangled device you refer to? I have heard angry mutterings from our children lately (as they hand-wash and spit-shine every utensil we own each night) that they too believe there is such a device. A device that would save them the drudgery of their collective ill-gotten lot in life... but I always thought it was a fanciful notion on par with Bigfoot, Yeti, and transparent government - yet now I see it may, in fact, be real... hmmm ... what to do?

  2. resist my friend,resist with all your might. We have told our children that we refuse to allow one of these evil contraptions in our home because we love them and it is for their own good

    But alas the evil dishwasher alliance has clouded their minds and turned them against us so now our own children think us mean and uncaring. Oh the heartbreak!